Christianity Today has this article up where it discusses whether or not women are too picky in selecting a man. It is based on the ever controverisal Lori Gottlieb book, "Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough ", which oddly enough is now being marketed as a Christian book. Got me!
Before I get to my main point, this part is good:"According to Gottlieb, the problem is that women are no longer satisfied with companionship, security, and stability. Instead, we believe we deserve it all, and that includes a soul mate who is exciting, passionate, masculine, and has the same emotions women do. To make matters worse, we start to believe that no matter how great a guy is, there must be someone better out there."Caveat: "She does not advocate resigning yourself to a life of misery with a man you find unpleasant, but rather, adjusting your expectations and being happy with a more realistic version of Mr. Right."
What I found most interesting, was the following:"Unfortunately, there is little acknowledgment that men should not be picky about the women they date. It is accepted without question that men choose women based on age and physical beauty. I can’t help wondering where the book is that tells men that they need to “settle” for a woman who is kind and caring but might not look like a supermodel."This is what women always have to do when something 'negative' is suggested of them, such as being "too picky", they have to deflect it back to men. Of course men can have similar faults, but the book is not talking about men; it is addressing women. Just because the author does not counter every female fault with a male fault, does not make for a downfall of the book. Had the purpose of the book been to equally critique men and women and we found the author being bias towards women, then such a criticism might be fair. Even if Gottlieb equally suggested that men are "too picky", what would be the point as men are not going to be reading that book; all it would do is just reinforce to women what they already believe. They just want to believe more than anything that the problem isn't them and are disturbed that Gottlieb didn't try to make them feel better or lessen the blow, by equally calling out men.
It's like they can't sit still for one minute without having to say "men do that too". Much like NAWALT was coined from "not all women are like that", I propose MDTT for the equally used "men do that too". Yes, yes, we get it, "Men do it too" and "all women aren't like that", but instead of whining about it and pointing the finger every time, just sit back and accept that women aren't perfect with no stammering or 'but, but, but-ing...". Don't deflect back to men and accuse men of starting it (whether they did or not is pointless), the point is improving and restoring women, and books such as "Marry Him", make an honest attempt in doing so. Don't worry about what the men are doing, but what you are doing.